Actively stepping out of anger
When we are angry, we are overly-emotional and often times irrational. As we practice meditation, we are able to bring greater awareness to the present moment, and therefore able to notice when we need to actively shift our emotional state. The simple act of bringing awareness to our breath offers us the possibility to change our state of consciousness.
Today, it seems easily forgotten that meditation is a practice, it implies coming back to it in order to reap the many benefits.
When I fall out of practice, I know I am quickly more irritable and impulsive. Meditating offers me a great sense of freedom as I feel more grounded and in my body, allowing me to be less affected by my often volatile emotions.
When we meditate, we are actively rewiring our brain, and this offers us the possibility to take on life’s challenges differently. Coming back to a place of clearheadedness is of paramount importance to avoid reacting to a situation, and the first step in allowing an appropriate response to arise.
Here is a step by step process I like to follow to help me shift my state when I get overwhelmed:
Identify my emotion
Write down on a piece of paper, in as few words as possible, how I am feeling. This helps get it out of my head, and stop me from further unravelling into a narrative that further fuels my negative emotion. I write how I am feeling as precisely and concisely as I can.
Get into my body
Tune into my breath: examine the experience as simply as possible. For this, I stay close to the sensations arising in my body. I start with my breath, and focus on lengthening my exhale to slow down my breath – when we slow down the breath, we slow down the mind. I spend 5 minutes getting into my body and noticing where I feel this emotion on a physical level. I acknowledge it, and visualise it dissolving with every exhale.
Shift my neural activity
Self regulating is most powerful in Humans, so once I’ve shifted my state physiologically by focusing on the breath, my mind is what needs tending next. I can anchor myself through more conscious breathing, coming into meditation, chanting a few mantras, or doing a Japa meditation practice with my mala beads (my favourite)…
Get out of myself & transcend my emotions
Now that I have given myself the opportunity to come back to the world with a more centred and grounded approach, I go and do something of service: water the plant, do the dishes, sweep the floor, give a compliment… anything that basically allows me to get active in a positive way.
What we acknowledge, we grow
Now I get to be proud of myself! I have just proven to myself that I have broken my pattern – it’s important to acknowledge that! This will allow me to come out of this whole experience feeling good, even though it all started with feeling not so great about myself.
Although this point is listed last, I find it to be one of the most important of the whole process. Acknowledging that we are not our negative patterns can be immensely healing. Having said that, it’s first important to own our feelings first, write them out and then go through the process that allows us to come out triumphant.